Five Reasons Why I Hate Clemson University

Here we go again. Hate week round three. Carolina and Clemson will meet once again, this time on the baseball diamond.

As always, tempers will be flaring and the hatred will be in the air throughout the weekend. Picking Clemson to win the series this weekend left a sour taste in my mouth.

In order to cope with it I compiled a list of reasons as to why I hate the University of Clemson as much as I do. 

The Colors 

Clemson fans feel the need to be seen at all times. Even if they are 100 yards away. As if Clemson fans were not obnoxious enough, they find a way to say “Hey everyone, I’m a jackass” without even saying it.

The fans pretend to love this awful color combination, even though everyone and their brother knows that it is only because they are the colors affiliated with their university. The worst punishment one could possibly give a man is locking him in a room with walls that are painted orange and purple, and that goes for everyone out there.

To all Clemson fans, be truthful with yourself. Come out and tell the world you know you don the ugliest colors in college athletics. Everyone knows it and everyone knows you know it too.

The Snooty Fanbase 

For some odd reason, Clemson fans have convinced themselves that they are the classiest fanbase in the country and all other fan bases are sinners in the hands of an angry God. Especially the University of South Carolina.

Clemson fans are absolutely appalled by the behavior of drunk South Carolina students (behaving as any 18-22 year old college student would) as they affiliate their behavior as the behavior of the entire fan base of South Carolina, young and old.

I guess Clemson fans don’t recall the “U-S-C Sucks Cock!” chant that echoes from Clemson student sections. Clemson fans will search long and hard for videos of South Carolina students and fans and will tweet about them, deeming their behavior as “classless.”

These actions by Clemson fans are identical to a 5 year old tattle tailing on his older brother. Grow up and get off Twitter you old geezers… 

Constant Reminder of Football Season 

When Clemson beats South Carolina in football they certainly won’t let you forget. In the eyes of a Clemson fan, every Carolina win in every sport is discredited if the Tigers beat the Gamecocks during football season.

I can recall very vividly, Clemson fans talking more smack than South Carolina fans while leaving a basketball game after getting pummeled by Carolina. “Oh basketball doesn’t matter. Baseball is irrelevant.” Says the fanbase that is currently celebrating a championship in Men’s soccer.

I am definitely not looking forward to hearing about the football score before first pitch Friday and I know it’s coming. 


Name a time you saw a toothless cretin sporting his orange tiger paw shirt speaking on how awful the city of Columbia is as he makes his way home to his trailer park in the upstate in his beat up pick up truck. For me, it’s simply too many times to count.

We get it. You prefer the country where your closest neighbor is five miles away and you can drink your Budweiser and smoke your Marlboro Reds in peace. We too prefer it that way because we’d like you as far away from civilization as humanly possible.

If I were in your shoes I too would be scared of the “Big City” AKA Columbia. Also when traveling to Columbia this weekend, please dear God take a bus or an Uber or something.

You people have no idea how to drive in traffic because you’re so used to driving on dirt roads. 


“Hey, let’s get gather the dumbest traditions we can think of and establish a University on them.”

Clemson’s traditions range from idiotic to down right weird and it’s not just South Carolina fans that will tell you that. Clemson fans believe their traditions are completely unique but at the same time will copy ones seen at other Southeastern Universities (LSU and Auburn).

The Tiger Rag is literally a song created by the Jazz Band Dixieland which was adopted by LSU and then adopted by Clemson 20 years later. Seriously, get a new song to play every five minutes. Maybe if Clemson players rub Howard’s Rock hard enough, a genie will appear and bless the University with new traditions.

Clemson fans will continue to believe that the traditions of their University are great, the same way they believe their University was not just founded by a group of angry racists.

Keep on believing Tiger Nation. 


Of course this list could drag on but I know reading comprehension is a difficult skill for your average Clemson fan. Before we know it this weekend will be over and we won’t have to stare and those God awful colors any longer.

As always, fuck Clemson and go Cocks baby! 

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